Parenting > Marketing Disconnection: When Did "You don't have to connect with your kids" Become a Selling Point?

Parenting > Marketing Disconnection: When Did "You don't have to connect with your kids" Become a Selling Point?

This car ad is touting quiet, non-interactive children as a primary benefit of a car with built-in wifi. Now bear in mind I'm a big tech fan and readily welcome advances. However, I'd rather hear my child in her boredom come up with something imaginative like "I'm jumping on a chocolate chip trampoline" than have them plugged in and tuned out. 

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"Good enough" is Both Good and Enough

"Good enough" is Both Good and Enough

Please, (PLEASE!) banish the comparison/"not good enough trap". For too many people "good enough" is settling because they didn't achieve perfection or excellence in X thing/endeavor/aspect of life. 

People (maybe even you) are constantly living in mortal fear that they have not reached the "standard" of how they "should" be, that they have, or will, "screw it all up" and ultimately fail... 

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Funny Tombstones & Maintaining Perspective

An elderly client told me years ago: "When I was a boy my mother said to me, 'Son, everything in this life matters... just not very much." Your life matters. It's a one shot around this amazing spinning globe. Life is precious and rare in our end of the galaxy. Make the most of it. Enjoy it. Do good. Make the world and someone's life a little better for your passing. Just don't let your ego fool you into thinking you're so darn important.  Shelley wrote the following famous poem reminding us of just this very thing:

Ozymandias

I met a traveller from an antique land
Who said: `Two vast and trunkless legs of stone
Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand,
Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown,
And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command,
Tell that its sculptor well those passions read
Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things,
The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed.
And on the pedestal these words appear --
"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level sands stretch far away.'
—Percy Bysshe Shelley

A more modern version might be "all we are is dust in the wind..." by Kansas

Anyway, as we ponder the transience of life, there are a few folks who've left their final mark on their headstones as follows:

Funny Tombstones & Maintaining Perspective

An elderly client told me years ago: "When I was a boy my mother said to me, 'Son, everything in this life matters... just not very much." Your life matters. It's a one shot around this amazing spinning globe. Life is precious and rare in our end of the galaxy. Make the most of it. Enjoy it. Do good. Make the world and someone's life a little better for your passing. Just don't let your ego fool you into thinking you're so darn important.  Shelley wrote the following famous poem reminding us of just this very thing:

Ozymandias

I met a traveller from an antique land Who said: `Two vast and trunkless legs of stone Stand in the desert. Near them, on the sand, Half sunk, a shattered visage lies, whose frown, And wrinkled lip, and sneer of cold command, Tell that its sculptor well those passions read Which yet survive, stamped on these lifeless things, The hand that mocked them and the heart that fed. And on the pedestal these words appear -- "My name is Ozymandias, king of kings: Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!" Nothing beside remains. Round the decay Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare The lone and level sands stretch far away.' —Percy Bysshe Shelley

A more modern version might be "all we are is dust in the wind..." by Kansas

Anyway, as we ponder the transience of life, there are a few folks who've left their final mark on their headstones as follows:

[gdl_gallery title="funny-tombstones" width="IMAGE_SRC" height="IMAGE_HEIGHT" ]

Guest Blogger: Katrina Wride VanWagenen on "Managing Stress by Mindfully Owning Your AWESOMENESS"

Guest Blogger: Katrina Wride VanWagenen on "Managing Stress by Mindfully Owning Your AWESOMENESS"

Sharing your experiences of trials, pain, acceptance, and endurance that shows me who you are. Keep on going, brighten your day and someone else's. Make a go to list of things that make you awesome, and things that bring a smile to your face when life seems a tad overwhelming, or hugely overwhelming.

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Top 5 Holiday Stress-Busters & The Holiday Stress-Busting Guide

"It's the most wonderful stressful time of the year!" 

Holidays and family togetherness can be wonderful and/or miserable. Either way, there's a LOT to do over the holidays and it can get pretty stressful, and tense, quite quickly.
In response, a few years ago I was asked by a few TV stations to come talk about how to reduce stress over the holidays. The Top 5 Holiday Stress-Busters (free download) is what I shared. That got me thinking about our own holiday stresses in our family and extended families as well as all the ways I've helped my clients deal with the stress of family togetherness over the holidays. So five stress-busters quickly turned into 100's of stress-busters for the holidays (see guide below).
While there are many things that contribute to holiday stress, in 2004, The American Psychological Association conducted a holiday stress survey and identified the top six stressors as follows:
  1. Money
  2. Gift-giving
  3. Lack of time
  4. Families
  5. Diet
  6. Children’s issues

This guide addresses each of these stressors in depth, as well as many others, with a focus on providing many more solutions than there are problems. That’s the way it should be.

This guide covers hundreds of ways to bust, cool, chill, deal and cope with all the various stresses of the holidays.

Here's what you'll get:

  • Hundreds and hundreds of practical, useful and effective stress-busting tips, strategies, mindsets, and techniques for dealing with every aspect of holiday stress.
  • Worksheets to help you put the concepts into action.
  • The 30-Day Stress Tracker and the 31-60-Day "Overlearning!" Stress-Tracker

Download your eBook copy now and start busting your holiday stress!

Just take a peek at the Table of Contents:

INTRODUCTION

  • THE HOLIDAYS ARE NOT THE SAME FOR EVERYONE
  • STRESS 101
  • SIGNS & SYMPTOMS OF STRESS
  • ASSESS YOUR STRESS

WELL-BEING: PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL, & MENTAL STRESS-BUSTERS

  • PHYSICAL HEALTH STRESS-BUSTERS
  • SIMPLE PHYSICAL & MENTAL WORKOUTS WORK
  • RELAXATION & MINDFULNESS
  • STRESS-BUSTING ATTITUDES & MINDSETS
  • MOOD STRESS-BUSTERS
  • MENTAL ILLNESS STRESS BUSTERS
  • GET HELP WHEN YOU NEED IT

RELATIONSHIP & FAMILY STRESS-BUSTERS

  • RELATIONSHIP & FAMILY CONFLICT STRESS-BUSTERS
  • BUSTING STRESS WITH THE CHILDREN
  • CONNECTING WITH YOUR KIDS OVER THE HOLIDAYS
  • SEPARATION & DIVORCE STRESS-BUSTERS
  • STEP-FAMILY STRESS-BUSTERS
  • BEREAVEMENT & GRIEVING OVER THE HOLIDAYS
  • MOURNING THE LOSS OF THE PAST YEAR
  • LONELINESS & ISOLATION STRESS-BUSTERS
  • USING SOCIAL SUPPORTS AS STRESS-BUSTERS

TIME & MONEY STRESS-BUSTERS

  • FINANCIAL STRESS-BUSTERS
  • TIME PRESSURE STRESS-BUSTERS
  • GIFT-GIVING STRESS-BUSTERS
  • SHOPPING STRESS-BUSTERS
  • HOLIDAY MEAL STRESS-BUSTERS

ADDITIONAL STRESS-BUSTERS

  • COUNTER COMMERCIALISM
  • EXAMINE YOUR TRADITIONS
  • TRAVELING STRESS-BUSTERS
  • SOME ADDITIONAL STRESS BUSTERS
  • DO ONE THING DIFFERENT
  • HOLIDAY STRESS-BUSTING RESOURCE GUIDE
  • SHARE YOUR STRESS BUSTING TIPS!

 

Download your eBook copy now and start busting your holiday stress!

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A Circle Is a Nice Thing to Have

A Circle Is a Nice Thing to Have

I doodle and sketch to entertain myself and my children. It actually helps me pay attention. Doodling can do that for ADHD folks like me. Many things are "just because." Like how a circle is just a nice thing to have. Let me explain...

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Frugality in the Age of Excess

20111226-125531.jpg Last night in bed Kara looks at my pathetically hammered headphones (thanks kids!) that I had temporarily fixed with Gorilla Tape (think duct tape on steroids) and commented that she should've gotten me some new ones for Christmas. I told her, with a boyish twinkle in my eye she's familiar with, "Oh, no! Thanks, but I'm glad you didn't because I have plans for these." She knows me well enough to know that if anyone can fix something and make something last that I can.

There's an old pioneer saying I've always admired that goes as follows:

Use it up, wear it out, make it do or do without."

The modern-day version being:

Reuse. Repurpose. Recycle."

Thus, this morning in 10 minutes with a few rivets and a saved bracket from a prior project I not only have very sturdy and highly functional headphones (saved from the landfill, and money saved in my pocket) I also have a simple and enjoyable, "Cool! Look what I did!" sense of pride.

Then there's Kara. No one can find a deal like Kara. She is one of the most well-dressed (read: smokin' hot!) people I know. She stays fashionable and current. Always lovely. She wears nice clothes of fine quality. She can walk out of pricey Banana Republic with a an excited gleam in her own eye for some ridiculously awesome deal she found: She wears $300 outfits for which she's paid $30. How does she do this? She has a careful eye for great fashion, high quality and awesome deals combined with the patience and contentment to wait for just the right moment to pounce. "Instant gratification" is not in her vocabulary. "Wisdom," "ingenuity" and "cleverness" are though.

Speaking of which, she is one of the most contented people I know. She's said many times, "I can have it all, just not all at once." This is good, because for most of our marriage it was tiiiight financially.

To further illustrate her resourcefulness, one of our grad school friends, who were also as dirt poor as we were, had near-to-nothing left in their cupboard. She asked Kara to come over to help her figure out dinner because, "Kara can make something out of nothing!" It's true. No matter how poor we've been we've always eaten extremely well.

As a team, we've taken pride in our ability to figure things out. In our house, you frequently hear the above quotes above along with the following:

Make the best with what you've got."

The fine art of 'making do'."

and

Necessity is the mother of invention."

For us, individually and as a couple, frugality, contentment and creativity have done a lot to strengthen not only our characters but also our marriage.

In the age of excess we live in there is still (fortunately) plenty of room for, and plenty need of, frugality.

Q: What correlates do you see in this frugal/resourceful principle in regards to your relationships with partner and children? Give your answer below...

Mindfulness

"Moments are the molecules that make up eternity." —Neal A. Maxwell I teach mindfulness practices and mindsets to my clients. I am grateful for the power these skills have had in my life for reducing stress and in some areas removing it completely, and for it's impact in increasing joy in family life and the enjoyment of life in general.

This video is a perfect demonstration of mindfulness in action. Mindfulness is a concept learned from Zen which if looked for you will find at the center of all spiritual traditions.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l70e1TfN34w&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Busting Holiday Stress


It's the most wonderful time of the year! And it can be the most stressful.

In 2004, The American Psychological Association conducted a holiday stress survey and identified the top six stressors as follows:

1. Money
2. Gift-giving
3. Lack of time
4. Families
5. Diet
6. Children’s issues

This guide addresses each of these stressors in depth, as well as many others, with a focus on providing many more solutions than there are problems. That’s the way it should be.

This guide covers hundreds of ways to bust, cool, chill, deal and cope with all the various stresses of the holidays.

Here's what you'll get:

  • Hundreds and hundreds of practical, useful and effective stress-busting tips, strategies, mindsets, and techniques for dealing with every aspect of holiday stress.
  • Worksheets to help you put the concepts into action.
  • The 30-Day Stress Tracker and the 31-60-Day "Overlearning!" Stress-Tracker

Pick yours up today at bardos.net/HolidayStressBusters

Just take a peek at the Table of Contents:

INTRODUCTION

  • THE HOLIDAYS ARE NOT THE SAME FOR EVERYONE
  • STRESS 101
  • SIGNS & SYMPTOMS OF STRESS
  • ASSESS YOUR STRESS

WELL-BEING: PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL, & MENTAL STRESS-BUSTERS

  • PHYSICAL HEALTH STRESS-BUSTERS
  • SIMPLE PHYSICAL & MENTAL WORKOUTS WORK
  • RELAXATION & MINDFULNESS
  • STRESS-BUSTING ATTITUDES & MINDSETS
  • MOOD STRESS-BUSTERS
  • MENTAL ILLNESS STRESS BUSTERS
  • GET HELP WHEN YOU NEED IT

RELATIONSHIP & FAMILY STRESS-BUSTERS

  • RELATIONSHIP & FAMILY CONFLICT STRESS-BUSTERS
  • BUSTING STRESS WITH THE CHILDREN
  • CONNECTING WITH YOUR KIDS OVER THE HOLIDAYS
  • SEPARATION & DIVORCE STRESS-BUSTERS
  • STEP-FAMILY STRESS-BUSTERS
  • BEREAVEMENT & GRIEVING OVER THE HOLIDAYS
  • MOURNING THE LOSS OF THE PAST YEAR
  • LONELINESS & ISOLATION STRESS-BUSTERS
  • USING SOCIAL SUPPORTS AS STRESS-BUSTERS

TIME & MONEY STRESS-BUSTERS

  • FINANCIAL STRESS-BUSTERS
  • TIME PRESSURE STRESS-BUSTERS
  • GIFT-GIVING STRESS-BUSTERS
  • SHOPPING STRESS-BUSTERS
  • HOLIDAY MEAL STRESS-BUSTERS

ADDITIONAL STRESS-BUSTERS

  • COUNTER COMMERCIALISM
  • EXAMINE YOUR TRADITIONS
  • TRAVELING STRESS-BUSTERS
  • SOME ADDITIONAL STRESS BUSTERS
  • DO ONE THING DIFFERENT
  • HOLIDAY STRESS-BUSTING RESOURCE GUIDE
  • SHARE YOUR STRESS BUSTING TIPS!

Pick yours up today at bardos.net/HolidayStressBusters


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