5/52: Be a Real Man—"Whatta Man" by Salt 'N' Pepa (feat. En Vogue)


Whatta Man, Salt 'N' Pepa (feat. En Vogue)

CHORUS: Whatta man, whatta man, whatta man, whatta mighty good man (repeat 4x)

I wanna take a minute or two, and give much respect due
To the man that's made a difference in my world
And although most men are ho's he flows on the down low
Cuz I never heard about him with another girl
But I don't sweat it because it's just pathetic
To let it get me involved in that he said/she said crowd
I know that ain't nobody perfect,
I give props to those who deserve it
And believe me y'all, he's worth it
So here's to the future cuz we got through the past
I finally found somebody that can make me laugh (Ha ha ha)
You so crazy I think I wanna have your baby


My man is smooth like Barry, and his voice got bass
A body like Arnold with a Denzel face
He's smart like a doctor with a real good rep
And when he comes home he's relaxed with Pep
He always got a gift for me everytime I see him
A lot of snot-nosed ex-flames couldn't be him
He never ran a corny line once to me yet
So I give him stuff that he'll never forget
He keeps me on Cloud Nine just like the Temps
He's not a fake wannabe tryin' to be a pimp
He dresses like a dapper don, but even in jeans
He's a God-sent original, the man of my dreams

Yes, my man says he loves me, never says he loves me not
Tryin' to rush me good and touch me in the right spot
See other guys that I've had, they tried to play all that mack sh**
But every time they tried I said, "That's not it"
But not this man, he's got the right potion
Baby, rub it down and make it smooth like lotion
Yeah, the ritual, highway to heaven
From seven to seven he's got me open like 7-11
And yes, it's me that he's always choosin'
With him I'm never losin', and he knows that my name is not Susan
He always has heavy conversation for the mind
Which means a lot to me cuz good men are hard to find


My man gives real loving that's why I call him Killer
He's not a wham-bam-thank-you-ma'am, he's a thriller
He takes his time and does everything right
Knocks me out with one shot for the rest of the night
He's a real smooth brother, never in a rush
And he gives me goose pimples with every single touch
Spends quality time with his kids when he can
Secure in his manhood cuz he's a real man
A lover and a fighter and he'll knock a knucker out
Don't take him for a sucker cuz that's not what he's about
Every time I need him, he always got my back
Never disrespectful cuz his mama taught him that




Time to sing props for me this time! Go me! While I don't have a voice like Barry, a body like Arnold, nor the Denzel face, I do have a will, commitment and desire to treat you right. This isn't meant to be self-congratualtory (okay, yes it is, but that's beside the point...), it is meant to simply say you have a good man and you deserve a good man. I hold myself to a high husbandly standard for three reasons:

  1. Because I take pride in being who I am;
  2. Because you deserve to be treated right and holding myself to that standard ensures that you get your dues. I take pride in seeing you well-loved; and
  3. Our kids deserve to see their mother treated well. I take pride in that, too.

What do I get out of it? I get a LOT out of treating you well—a sense of pride and accomplishment in the one area that matters above all else: Relationships in the home. In return, you indeed know how to keep your man happy, attracted, and appreciated. You are so good to me. I have a "mighty mighty good woman." —J

PS: Favorite line?  "And when he comes home he's relaxed with Pep" ;-)


Be a Real Man. Because "good men are hard to find" that makes you being a good man all the more precious and priceless to your baby. Give your woman a man to be proud of. Give your children an example to follow. Show your boys how to be man who knows how to treat a woman. Show your girls how they should be honored and respected by their man.

"The most important thing a father can do for his children
is to love their mother."
—Theodore Hesburgh  

You may have noticed besides the good traits highlighted in this song, it also has a lot of sexual innuendo and reference. A lot of songs have sex in them. What's different with this song is that the sexual references are in relation to being treated right and reciprocity. Many men I work with wish their women were more sexual and many women are bothered by how much their men want sex. There's a LOT to this topic, however, here's the short version: Men treat your women right (like the GR Principles throughout these VAY Projects) and women will feel more emotionally tuned into and connected with and then will often feel more open to sex because it's now about relationship and emotional connection and not "just sex". This is the path to improving a couples sex life.