The three stages of love and marriage:
You don't know 'em, but you love 'em.
You know 'em, and don't love 'em.
You know 'em and you love 'em.
THE LOVE NOTE
Enter Stage One: As friends first and then when we dated what wasn't there to love? We only saw the best of the best of each other. And it was good stuff. Then we married. Enter Stage Two. That wasn't always easy. We got to know each other—our good sides and our worst sides and the feeling of love would transiently ebb and flow. Now I can gladly say that we have Entered Stage Three. We know each other—the good, the bad, the annoying, the silly, the goofy, the irritating, the inspiring, the encouraging, the sweet and the considerate—and we love each other. We've learned and grown. I can honestly say I love you better BECAUSE I know YOU for who you REALLY are. I am a better person because of you and all we have learned from each other and with each other. It can only keep getting better.
THE GREAT RELATIONSHIP PRINCIPLE
Gain true knowledge of your partner. Gain knowledge—I did not say gain assumptions or gain judgments or gain criticisms or gain interpretations or gain perceptions. I said gain true knowledge. Study your partner as he or she IS not how you think he or she SHOULD be. Knowing is a process, not an event. Knowing another person is a slow, progessive, development that occurs over time. Give it time and study well without the knowledge barriers listed above.
The Chinese character for "knowing", as shown above, has more than one meaning including "awake, wake up", "feel, sense", "discover, find out", and "arouse". These are good concepts for gaining knowledge.